Charleston Parent Story

This first-person story is an example of voice and community-led system change that shows the journey of a Charleston parent who engaged with WM2U when she attended a family group in the summer of 2023. As a mother of three, she was looking for a supportive and welcoming space where she could connect with her children and other families.

I worked in retail for seven years and then had to give up work to look after my three children, with my eldest being in and out of school. I had a lot of anxiety when I first attended a family group with my two younger children, at the Charleston community centre. However, I have noticed as time has passed, I can deal with my anxiety a lot better. I am also better at dealing with people, because you meet others from all walks of life, and I speak to everyone now, even when I am out of the community centre.

I am not as nervous; I can be myself.

Now, I am the Chair of Charleston Matters, and this involves running the Wee-Night-In each Monday afternoon for local families and organising planning meetings. I am also part of the Lochee Takeover, which is a group responsible for the Make it Happen Fund that is a community initiative for local people who have an idea or project they want to develop.
The staff at Charleston community centre have really helped with my anxiety as well as the other parents. The staff know the ‘good, the bad and the ugly,’ they have seen it all, and no-one feels scared to be vulnerable, because they are so understanding and don’t judge. The parents have also become quite close, we phone each other if we need anything, and we meet up outside of Charleston Matters, we are like a wee family.

My eldest son, he has been through a lot of hard times, and being part of Charleston Matters gives me a voice to share what is needed in the community for others, particularly young people. I have seen personally how parts of the system are failing young people. For example, I have supported one of my sons’ friends to find a place of his own after he was struggling with housing and had to stay with me for a while. I had to keep phoning services and really persevering. I don’t have a big enough house or the money to be supporting my sons’ friends, but I do it because otherwise they wouldn’t have any support. My work with Charleston Matters has helped me find ways to better support my eldest son, before I was reactive, but that doesn’t work, and I have found ways to deal with things in a calmer way. I feel more confident in myself, and better connected from the relationships I have built with Charleston Matters and other organisations. Things are not perfect, but they are better.

I have learnt a lot from running the Wee-Night-In. Some weeks can be quite hectic, we are engaging with 26 families, and we have had to close the group because sadly we can’t cater for that many people. We have a waiting list with some requirements. For example, if a family doesn’t attend for 4 weeks and are not in communication, then they go on the waiting list. Because of the large numbers, we are looking to build some more structure, with people helping to deliver activities. We have also learnt that we need to let parents to know that the Wee-Night-In is not a creche, or a ‘free for all.’ It is a family group, and we are all responsible to making sure it runs smoothly from helping to prepare, be part of activities, and cleaning up. It is a learning curve, and things are going in the right direction. We have a plan, with a rota, so people can take turns to be responsible for different areas, like cooking. We also run our own fundraising activities and are applying to funding to keep the Wee-Night-In going. Our hopes for Charleston Matters are to help support and mentor other groups in Dundee, and to have our own space so we can run other activities, like a cooking group, health and well-being group, parents and youth groups, and drop-in support. We hope that Charleston Matters is an inspiration for how other local family groups can be developed and delivered, because some community centres can be better used, there is so much more out there that can be done. It’s also about professionals genuinely listening to parents and their children’s needs.

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